Episode 147 – Drug taking Conservative leadership candidates, Peterborough by-elections, car factory closures and to be honest, not much else happening at all, and even only one of those stories is really all that important. But still there’s an hour of this podcast and no one is sure how. Plus Tiernan (@tiernandouieb) chats to Jake Hanrahan (@jake_hanrahan) at Popular Front (@PopularFrontCo) about reporting on irregular warfare.
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Drug taking Conservative leadership candidates, Peterborough by-elections, car factory closures and to be honest, not much else happening at all, and even only one of those stories is really all that important. But still there’s an hour of this podcast and no one is sure how. Plus Tiernan (@tiernandouieb) chats to Jake Hanrahan (@jake_hanrahan) at Popular Front (@PopularFrontCo) about reporting on irregular warfare.
Links and sources of info from Jake’s interview:
All the usual ParPolBro stuff:
Hello and welcome to the Partly Political Broadcast the comedy politics podcast that looks at the political landscape and wonders why no one’s ever realized it should be hung as a portrait and maybe that’s why it doesn’t make sense and looks shit. This is episode 147, I’m Tiernan Douieb and this week as leadership hopeful and composite of a pomegranate, a melted sex toy and every cast member of Grange Hill, Michael Gove, revealed that he took cocaine several times 20 years ago, I have two questions. Can you imagine what he’d be like if he enjoyed the sound of his own voice even more than he already does? Unbearable. And does this mean that unlike the former party leader, that his lines are indeed moveable?
Yes, Prime Minister and forgotten kitchen implement Theresa May is no longer head of the Conservative Party, meaning they are now officially without leadership. No real change from the last few years then. May is going to stay as PM until, as she says, her party successor gains the confidence of the House of Commons, so yes, it’s likely she’ll still be at number 10 for quite some time considering the current line-up would struggle to get the confidence of a squirrel if they were wearing a suit made of acorns. However, this does mean that the leadership race is officially on and the contest has really heated up in the last few days, if you can actually heat something involving so many cold-blooded individuals. I guess it is sort of tepid at best. The line-up of contenders, looking a lot like a Guess Who Melted Toby Jug edition, is now down to ten. Boris, Gove, Hancock, Harper, Hunt, Javid, Leadsom, McVey, Raab and Stewart aka Ten Things I Hate About Blue. Stock Photo of someone who’s been injured using a photocopier James Cleverly dropped out last week on account of realizing no one likes him, probably. SpongeBob Shitpants Kit Malthouse also dropped out saying that there was an appetite for this contest to be over quickly, so its surprising he didn’t try to offer some sort of crap compromise where it would be done on time but by not having any contenders. Then hours before the final ten were announced man entirely made of circles Sam Gyimah pulled out saying he didn’t have enough time to build support which proves he wasn’t right for the Conservative leadership anyway as they all know you don’t build support, you pay for it.
The final ten have started pitching their campaign pledges, most of which seem entirely designed to appeal to a very specific demographic of the type of person who probably calls the police every time rubbish collectors come for their bins because they aren’t wearing a suit and must clearly be thieves. Case in point is current favorite and sleeping bag filled with dog food Boris Johnson who’s main promises are to cut tax for people earning over £50k which is great as that’ll really help those hit by austerity as they watch the person down the road in the 5 bed house light their bonfire with that extra £500 they’ve gained. Boris’s aim is for the 40% tax rate to only start at £80k which is convenient for MPs as their new salary raise brings them to just under that. I mean could Johnson have been any more blatant at trying to get backing from his colleagues. He may as well have promised free trips to Chessington for anyone who’s ruined the lives of disabled people or a weekly grouse shooting session on Parliament Square for anyone who’s fucked up Brexit.
Speaking of the latter, Boris’s other big selling point is promising that the UK will not have to pay the EU the £39bn that covers lots of things that we’ve already used because nothing says to the rest of the world, hey, trade with us, we’ll gladly use up all your stuff then when you send the bill, tell you get stuffed. I’m guessing Boris is aware that him becoming PM will definitely force Scotland to go independent then any letters we get sent from the EU about it, addressed to the United Kingdom, will just get returned to sender with ‘no longer at this address’ written on it. Boris also suggested at a hustings last week that the best way to find a way out of the Brexit impasse would just be to remove the backstop from any withdrawal agreement, because it appears that his time as Foreign Secretary was mostly spent being so ignorant of anything happening in Parliament that it would all seem foreign to him. Boris has warned that his party faces extinction if they don’t get Brexit done, which seems a really great reason to remain. Hey, extinction happens to all the worst dinosaurs.
This is all very much in line with the theme of the leadership contest which appears to be ‘shitty, shitty policies that only people who take their private jet just to go to the supermarket’ would vote for. Ray Harryhausen creation Rory Stewart says he’ll create a National Citizenship service for young people to help in the community, you know in-between their non-paid care work, low paid zero hours jobs and dissipating education hopes but hey I’m sure somewhere in amongst all that they’ll have time to sweep the front drive of a baby boomers mansion for free. Inspiration for Abigail in the Crucible, Esther McVey says there is nothing to fear from a no deal, which about as reassuring as Freddy Kruger telling you him doing your dental procedure will be fine. Her main policy if she became leader seems to be to just suspend parliament until October 31st so we’d just sort of fall out of the EU like we’re suffering from cardiac arrest. Only person formed inside sausage casing Dominic Raab is pledging to redirect £500m a year from the aid budget to instead use for endangered species and habitats, because I guess that is what the Conservatives will need if someone like him ends up in charge.
While dazed ostrich Jeremy Hunt said that while he wouldn’t change the law, his personal view was that the legal time limit from abortions should be reduced from 24 weeks to just 12, which is a strange thing to say for a man who’s living proof it should be moved to 52 years. Hunt is now being backed by the worst of Jessica Lange’s characters Amber Rudd, because I guess it makes sense for one unaware politician to back another. Rudd said that Jeremy Hunt is a serious leader for serious times which begs the question as to whether she’s met her? It’s like wheeling out a boneless clown as your new police commissioner saying you need someone who’s tough to be tough on crime before they flop out of the wheelbarrow and roll down the stairs while making fart noises. Hunt used the Junior Doctor’s strike and his time as a culture secretary to prove he’s good at negotiations, so I look forward to a prime minister who’ll head to Brussels just to hide behind a tree for four hours until it all goes away. Robert Crumb sketch David Lidlington is backing Beano character Matt Hancock, presumably out of pity.
But all of this policy chat has paled in the news cycle on account of Michael Gove’s admittance that he took cocaine 20 years ago, despite writing articles criticizing middle class professionals who take drugs and then being a justice secretary who oversaw drugs policies disproportionately punish young black men. Though to be fair, that is exactly the sort of thing that will appeal to Tory members. If Gove could now reveal that he once spoke real posh to be allowed across a border while condemning immigration, or once lied about a leg injury to avoid a meeting while criticizing supposed benefit cheats, they’d lap that up like a thirsty dog at a piss puddle. While its mainly been used to criticize him, taking drugs is pure leadership right? I mean lots of idiots keep comparing Brexit to World War 2 and Churchill was off his tits for pretty much all of that. What’s to say a Gove full of crack charging into the EU Commission and talking their tits off about all his big plans won’t make them give us a deal just to get rid of him as fast as possible? This was the second blow, pun intended, to Gove in the week after US President and extra in TV’s Chernobyl Donald Trump said that he didn’t know who he was despite Gove exclusively interviewing him for The Times in 2017. To be fair to Trump, I think most people who’ve met Gove have had to repress the memory in order to avoid the night terrors that’d follow.
Rory Stewart already confessed to his smoking opium in Iran, Boris has previously said that he’s taken cocaine when he was young but that it may have been icing sugar, which may have led to his lifetime of sugar coating some awful bollocks. Raab said he has smoked weed in the past though you’d never tell as he always looks so stressed, he’s basically air-packed, and so did McVey, Hunt and Andrea Leadsom but we’re not sure if that’s as a mother. The saddest thing is that they’ll all back strict drug policies leading to harsh punishments for others, when what they should be saying is ‘look things are so shit, we should all be on drugs right now and I propose everyone gets them free on the NHS’. It’s just a such a shame none of them took MDMA or maybe they did, and this is the nationwide come down we all deserve. Just to make sure everyone knows he’s a massive spod, shaved mole Sajid Javid said he hasn’t ever taken drugs but he liked a cigarette, punched bullies first and loves a cheeky Nandos. That translated means he once saw someone smoke, was a bully and has been told by a 50-year-old Conservative advisor with no children what to say so he’s down with the kids.
The BBC will host a Conservative leadership hustings program next week on Tuesday 18th June titled ‘Our Next Prime Minister’ which is a terrible title. They really should’ve gone for We’re All Doomed, Same Shit Different Twat, Cock Fighting, Winner Ruins It All, No Matter Who Wins We All Lose, The Battle Of Wastings, Summer Offensive, or the Grand Irrational. What is clear is that whichever hugely unpopular delusional moron that gets chosen, they’d struggle to ruin things even more than the last unpopular delusional moron as the Conservatives came third in the Peterborough by-election last week, their worst result in that constituency since 1886. Instead the seat was held by Labour, on a majority of only 683 over the Brexit Party who came second despite absolutely no manifesto. Which basically shows that to the Cambridgeshire residents the Conservatives policies are worse than having absolutely no idea what someone would do for your area. I see your tough action on fly tipping but I’d prefer this person who may be promising to personally take a shit on my doorstep every day and set fire to it, but I just don’t know.
So instead Lisa Forbes who has the sort of smile that says ‘I’ve just farted and blamed it on someone else’ is now the elected MP, despite a row over her liking a Facebook post that had the title ‘Theresa May has a Zionist Slave Master’s agenda’ which isn’t acceptable at all, unless it was actually a picture of May, holding up a piece of paper that said exactly that on it which happened to be the non-PC title of a 70’s prog rock band. Labour said that Forbes is not racist in any way, which is a bit like Esther McVey saying that there is nothing to fear from a no deal. Forbes has apologized and Labour have said that she liked the posts without reading them, which to be fair, is the only real way to survive Facebook. The Brexit Party conceded defeat before the results were announced because they just can’t stop insisting they leave before the deadline. The Party were quoted as saying that Labour only won because of the Pakistani vote in the inner-city wards, where, as they said, there are up to 14 of them in a house registered to vote. Great to see that the racists in the Brexit Party are the type of smarty pants who think leaving the EU might stop immigration from Asia.
Brexit party leader and amalgamation of all the Doctor Who villains and an armpit Nigel Farage evaded press for most of the evening, hiding in a toilet till it was all over, lucky that no one tried to flush him away rather than out. Peterborough was a 61% Leave voting area so while it was close, the Brexit party not winning doesn’t look good for Nige’s chances in Westminster. Despite this, he turned up the next day to Number 10 Downing Street with a letter demanding the Brexit party, with no MPs, have a seat at the Brexit negotiations. Except they turned up on May’s last day as Conservative leader during a time that negotiations aren’t yet happening. Talk about a hollow gesture, but even if for some weird reason the next leader did agree to that, Farage would probably only spend each meeting hiding in the toilet every time something didn’t go his way. Though to be fair, if Jeremy Hunt ends up in charge, chances are he’ll be there too.
Speaking of new parties that just give you even more ways to be disappointed in politics, Change UK have already split as a party, which means finally their barcode logo makes sense, as it’s obviously just all their candidates that have quit and had to have their names redacted. Six MPs including Chuka ‘crosses his fingers behind his back while making every promise’ Ummuna, Heidi ‘I’ll just pencil it in incase’ Allen, Angela ‘flaky in every sense of the word’ Smith, Sarah ‘turns out I prescribe something else’ Wollaston, Luciana ‘one day I’ll find a non-racist party’ Berger and Gavin ‘I always leave a party before they can leave me’ Shuker have all gone. It seems that they were right when they announced politics is broken, as now so are they. The six have gone back to being independents while David Lynch character Anna Soubry is now leader and the party is keeping the name meaning that she can do all the greatest hits while on tour, if they had any and were going anywhere at all.
In other news the Chancellor and human stalactite Philip Hammond has rejected the idea that millions of people in the UK are in poverty because, as he says, he doesn’t see it. I bet he also won’t eat sandwiches that aren’t cut into triangles with the crusts removed and wished he could stay up past 8pm. A report by UN rapporteur on extreme poverty in the UK compared poverty and welfare support to a Victorian workhouse, but millionaire Hammond said that was nonsense because it’s not what he sees in this country as there’s none of it in 11 Downing Street, or the Treasury, or those few times he’s had to look under the sofa cushions for his phone or keys and his cleaners are too busy with their 4 other badly paid jobs to do it for him. It might be a good idea to persuade Philip that nothing exists if he can’t see it, then let him blissfully walk around a busy London with a blindfold on for a few weeks making sure he crosses as many roads as possible.
Hammond also said that tackling the climate crisis and reducing carbon emissions to zero would cost £1tn and mean there was less money for schools and hospitals because it turns out he cares about them when it means he can use it as an excuse not to care about something else. Downing Street have said Hammond’s calculations are incorrect, but if he’s right then that’s every day the Cuadrilla fracking contract has been stopped because it keeps causing earthquakes – £94000, losing court cases because you’ve failed to tackle air pollution – £500k, a new runway for Heathrow airport which would increase pollution loads – £14bn, reducing carbon emissions to zero a necessary £1tn, Philip Hammond being taken out by a giant climate crisis fire tsunami because he can’t see it so therefore it doesn’t exist. Priceless.
Labour have announced that they are scrapping social mobility for social justice because there’s no point in getting someone somewhere if when they get there, er, its illegal. No that’s not what it means, it’s actually a good idea to stop the idea of a meritocracy and just make things better for everyone. Which makes sense for Labour to do when everyone in their cabinet isn’t necessarily there because they’ve earned it, but more because they’ve just stuck around and suffered for ages.
And the Free TV license for over 75’s is to be scrapped, with the only exception being if they receive pension credit. Seems like a stupid move when all you’re really saying to pensioners is ‘hey save money and you won’t have to watch the Conservative leadership debates either’. Win win!
Greetings ParPolBrods, how is there so much to say about so little happening? I mean in many years time, the Wiki entry or whatever it’ll be then, for June 2019 will mostly be about Justin Bieber challenging Tom Cruise to a fight and then an entry that just reads ‘some tedious shit happened in Britain while it rained’. That’ll be it. This is my general gripe at the moment, how much news, time and complaining is based on such minor things when there’s bigger important things, or in lieu of discussing those, maybe we could just have a rest? It could be because I have no time for anything anymore in-between working and looking after mini-Douieb but whenever I look at social media or large chunks of the news or general conversations with people I don’t really want to talk to, my brain is mostly screaming ‘NO ONE CARES BECAUSE THE WORLD IS BURNING’ on repeat. It’s like when people complain that freedom of speech is being oppressed when in reality it’s just that no one wants to hear what they’ve got to say because it’s either hateful, or incredibly boring. No one’s stopping you saying it to a wall in a darkened room, just please don’t tell me as I’d much rather have various Cbeebies theme tunes on loop in my head while my eyes glaze over. If you’re interested, its mostly the Twirlywoos one which I often pretend was sung by someone who thought they were the next Dylan or James Taylor but instead have their biggest audience at 6am, a large amount of whom can’t even talk and are more excited by squealing colourful blobs. Or its Ra Ra The Noisy Little Lion which is narrated by Lorraine Kelly played by Lorraine Kelly, a woman who I have unexpectedly stanned after seeing the clip of her giving all the shade to Esther McVey, which is just beautiful. That notion that everyone would get along if it wasn’t for politics and religion sometimes works in reverse. I’ve really had little brain space for Lorraine Kelly played by the actor Lorraine Kelly but now I know she also thinks McVey is a complete tool, Kelly is obviously a champ.
What I meant to say was of course, hello, thanks for coming back to what is essentially just me running out of descriptive terms for Conservative leadership candidates and thanks this week especially to 20th attempt at a nickname, which is such solid iTunes name work and JezWrites for the lovely iTunes reviews. Much appreciated. Jez also asked that I get a pro-Brexit person on, but preferably some who, and I quote ‘aren’t mental.’ I’d love to, I really would but that latter bit is the hard bit. Anyone any of you would suggest? Someone who would be up for having a proper chat about it? Please let me know. Also I’m going to stop asking you to review the show or donate every week, and just assume that you might all do it of your own accord as let’s face it, its clearly the worst bit of the podcast every week, you know apart from all the other bits. You’re all grown-ups, or at least children stepping above pod grade, so if you want to review the show I’ll just look the other way and be pleasantly surprised when you do. Same with throwing any donation my way via the links in the pod blurb…ah shit, I’ve just done it haven’t I? Damn the pod curse. Well I won’t tell you to review the show or donate to the ko-fi or patreon again. Promise. Ah balls. Its so hard.
On the subject of reviewing though, shout out to the Greek listening massive as this podcast is, for some reason, doing better in Greece in the iTunes charts way more than any other country, so I can only assume Brits are on holiday or you’re having a lovely bit of schadenfreude over our EU situ. Whatever it is, parakalo. Which I’ve probably said all wrong and now you’ll unsubscribe. Oh god, it’s the Botswana charts all over again.
On this week’s show I chat to Jake Hanrahan who runs the Popular Front site, doing investigative journalism into irregular warfare. He’s a fascinating man and we had such an excellent chat. Plus, some stuff about cars, because I mean, yes its important but also, there really is nothing else. Sort of feels apt that I have to talk about cars because uk politics has exhausted every other story. I’m sorry but I’m also not. Here have this:
INTERVIEW WITH JAKE PART 1
Irregular warfare despite its name, doesn’t just mean the battles where sides don’t try to get even, but instead according to everyone’s online pal Wikipedia, is a violent struggle between non-state and state actors for legitimacy and influence over the relevant populations. No that doesn’t mean those who act in shows on the BBC and those who do Netflix ones, but more situations we’ve seen recently such as the Gilet Jaunes in France protesting against Macron and for economic justice, the Catalonian independence protests or the Syrian Civil War, to name but a few. It’s easy to forget quite how many conflicts like that are happening in the world today, not least because it isn’t shoved down your throat half as much as important news like which prospective Conservative leaders have taken which narcotic or exactly what about Brexit isn’t at all happening right now. The non-reporting of several situations could of course be down to its assumed lack of relevance to British audiences, its over complicated nature, the fact that the UK government can’t even remember its going on or very possibly because seeing the citizens of other countries rise up against oppression, injustice and fascism might just be too confusing for a country where in today’s day and age we mostly prefer to just tweet about things sarcastically and hope that’ll somehow stop austerity. Then you have the problem of when it is reported on, whether or not the angle that focused on is the real or most important one. I mean chances are that the side that’s getting all its weapons from the UK and who’s leader has popped by to No.10 for cream tea might not be the one fighting for the people after all, but who’s to say when the only report we get on it is a jokey report on BBC Breakfast about why a certain type of satsuma isn’t in shops right now.
Luckily we live in a world where independent media has an outlet, and while on the one hand it can mean a series of websites whose news is composed of a random word generator and whatever they had dreams about the night before, it also means proper journalists getting to do crowdfunded on the ground investigations. Cue Jake Hanrahan, who has been covering conflicts all over the world by, well, heading to them and speaking to people there. Jake has previously worked for a number of established outlets but in recent years decided that he wanted to focus on the bits that most mainstream media ignores and his YouTube series and podcast Popular Front does exactly that. From the PKK Youth Front, to Ukrainian Anarchists, to the Venezuelan rebellion or a Japanese Death Cult, Jake has an incredible knack for getting real reports from those involved even if it means, as in one example, he’s ended up in a Turkish prison cell for several weeks as a result. So, this week I spoke to Jake all about the situations he’s been in, why so many irregular wars aren’t reported, what Turkish prison is like, and if the UK is about to see any sort of uprising ever or if that’s all a bit too much effort especially when it’s raining outside. Here’s Jake:
INTERVIEW WITH JAKE PART 1
And we’ll be back with Jake in a minute but first…
The UK’s car industry used to be a thing of pride. I mean from the early 1900s to now, Britain has produced some amazing vehicles from the Austin Metro that looked like it was a doodle made by a child with a ruler, to the Lada which was like driving around a heavy butter dish or the Robin Reliant which felt like a warning to other cars incase they misbehaved. Its been a pretty big industry for over 100 years, now employing 180,000 directly, with another 640,000 in supply, retail and servicing. Or replacing my flat tyre after I drove into the curb on a bit on Friday. Thanks, Green Flag! I’m such an idiot but look I swear that curb snuck up on me. How was I meant to know that bit of road would have a border? Hmmm? Anyway, it also brings in an absolute ton of money with an £82bn turnover per year because that’s what happens when Chris Grayling is in charge of the trains.
It was announced last week that the Ford production factory in Bridgend is to close in 2020, meaning 1700 jobs will be lost and a huge chunk of the areas industry will be gone. So that’s now the Honda plant in Swindon going, Nissan’s Sunderland plant won’t be building their new SUV, Jaguar Land Rover are cutting 4500 jobs, Toyota say they could cut jobs too and Michelin is closing its tyre factory in Dundee, which I bet is because it’s been pissing about reviewing restaurants instead. That’s a lot of jobs and a lot of industry all gone in a few years and there has been a huge fall in car production this year. So is it because suddenly we’ve all decided horses are in again? Nope, sorry horses. Is it that everyone’s remember the planet exists and it’s raining so we’re all just staying indoors? Nope. Has the nation been struck with mass amaxophobia? No but I bet you’re glad I used that word. It’s good isn’t it? Is it to do with Brexit? Well, and you’ll be surprised by this, yes, but also be more surprised, it’s not just Brexit. Brexit is very much the nail in the tyre of a car that’s already ploughed into a brick wall.
So, the Brexit bit is the reason for a production slowdown. Most car makers had planned factory shutdowns or had move their summer maintenance showdowns to March 29th, in time for the OG Brexit day, because let’s face it, no one had a fucking clue what was going on, so everyone piss off home and hide there till it’s done. Except then it didn’t do and got delayed so production in April was slim to nada with nearly a 50% drop. Which has made the economy contract but not in the way that it might be leading to the birth of a new one, more in the way a spider’s legs go when it dies. Those are of course factories that are still running though, for now. Whereas Ford’s closure announcement last week, they said while a No Deal Brexit was catastrophic, it also wasn’t the only reason. It’s more to do with their plans to become a single global company, pulling all the Ford’s around the world together, except Harrison. Unfortunately, with Brexit, that meant Bridgend was competing against all the other Ford factories around the world, whereas previously it had just been with European ones. Brexit took a difficult situation and poked it right in the eye.
Nissan said that Brexit has sped up a decision about not building their X-Trail SUV at their Sunderland plant and moving it to Japan, but that it’s mostly to do with investment and issues with emissions regulations and sales forecasts. Though the UK missing out on the big EU trade deal with Japan possibly wouldn’t have helped much. But there are lots of other reasons too, including that a lot of people aren’t buying diesel cars anymore on account of them farting out planet murder, and the electrification of cars means production needs to change and sadly it usually goes where it’s cheapest. While that’s why Honda are shutting their Swindon factory in 2021, chances are if we have a no deal by then, they may keep it there as they’re able to pay all staff in Soylent green. So, a move to greener, cleaner energy is a good thing but the UK right now doesn’t have the infrastructure, or want to provide support for people losing jobs in the car industry. Somewhere like Bridgend will struggle to absorb nearly 2000 job losses unless investment is made. There are some potentials for the factory to develop vehicle batteries instead and a new Aston Martin factory is opening just a 20 minute drive away, though the head of manufacturing there said they’ve had over 100 people apply for every job going. Unite are also fighting to support the workers as much as possible. But fact is, unless money is put into development, a lot of British car manufacturing may be parked for the foreseeable future.
Yes, I’m ending it on that because all the news has been Conservative leadership candidates who probably aren’t even aware Wales exists.
And now back to Jake…
INTERVIEW WITH JAKE PART 2
Thanks to Jake for being up for a chat. You can find Jake on Twitter @Jake_Hanrahan or his website JakeHanrahan.com and his web doc series and podcast Popular Front that I can’t recommend enough is at popularfront.co and on there you’ll find links to the youtube videos and podcast episodes.
Huge thanks to Stefan for recommending I drop Jake a line and if you have anyone you suggest I interview for this show or subjects that I haven’t covered but I should, please let me know. I’m also aware that some of you have dropped me a line with suggestions and they’ve not made it onto this show but that is entirely their fault for never replying to my emails, or being illusive enough to have no easy way to contact them, or more likely, specifically avoiding me because they’d get so nervous and excited chatting to me that it might result in some sort of bodily accident. Ok, it’s never that. It’s just sometimes easier to think that that now my pitiful pleading email is sitting in a spam folder unloved. Sigh. Anyway, if you do have suggestions for me, where oh where can you send them? That’s right to @parpolbro on Twitter, the Partly Political Broadcast Facebook group, the contact page on partlypoliticalbroadcast.co.uk or email me at email@example.com. Or you could use steganography to conceal your message inside a microdot on an image that you send to me via the internets or on a well-placed billboard near my residence and many will walk past not knowing that within Taylor Swift’s eyebrow or a random man from an internet clothing companies’ earhole it contains a 10,000 word essay and contact details of all the guests I should ever speak to for this show. I will also walk past it, as I’m so tired and hate those adverts. It’s a terrible idea. As always, it’s probably best to email.
And that’s all for this week’s Partly Political Broadcast podcast. Thank you for allocating time for listen to this amongst your busy life schedule of lion cub rearing, tree engineering, teaching courses in dishwasher etiquette or whatever it is you do. Those are some of the things I imagine you do, don’t write in and ruin that. What you can do instead though is sponsor the show, review it, write in about thoughts relating to the podcast or otherwise, and blast noise about your enjoyment of this show everywhere you can so that other people can listen to it too, or more likely ignore you because let’s face it, most social media is now like an endlessly noisy, pointless, misery churning void and shouting links at people IRL makes them sad.
Thanks to Acast who host this show as without them it’d just sit on my laptop and you’d all have to listen to someone doing something joyful and whimsical instead which sounds awful. Thanks to my brother The Last Skeptik for all the tunery and to Kat Day for typing up the linear liner notes for partlypoliticalbroadcast.co.uk every week.
This will be back next week when Conservative leadership candidate Boris Johnson announces that he can’t get through the day without bumping ket off an illegally netted fresh dolphin carcass, Matt Hancock says he starts every day with a speedball and Mark Harper shocks everyone and causes mass upset by speaking out loud in a public area.
This week’s show was sponsored by the Change UK calendar. Got an important date you’ve promised you’ll keep? Add it to your Change UK calendar and it’ll cancel it before you get there. With new erasing technology, the Change UK calendar will barely resemble what you bought six months ago with only half the pages and absolutely none of the content. The Independent Group Anna Soubry and the Soubremes calendar, for when everything else is broken and so is your life.